Greetings Earthlings. This is a radar message from your favourite post-teen deadbeat, Toronto Female Blogger.
I hate “blogger” as a descriptor, because it carries so many unsavoury connotations: e.g. someone pays me for targeted ad space // I have e-partnerships with e-assholes supplying readers with knockoff fast fashion sourced from questionable third world factories // I am desperately hoping that readers will want to mimic my lifestyle choices // I’m a millenial asshat.
In fact, I am probably just a regular asshat. I like hats; they are the head equivalent of dabbing a napkin to soak up the grease of an off-brand microwave oven pizza.
The two girls who “run” Music Between Friends haven’t been posting much in the last few months, probably because I went back to school for radio, and Sasha has a Real Girl Job that she is very good at. The benefit to this is that my weekly podcasts sound a lot better when I can actually find the time to record them in the studio. In fact, the sensitivity is so markedly different between my apartment and the booth that I have to be very careful about farting on air, because the mics definitely pick that up.
One thing that’s hard to swallow: dry vitamins. Another thing: making zero dollars when you’re used to a bi-monthly paycheque.
Since finding out that William Alexander released Girls Basketball on cassette via Juniper Tree, I’ve been debating whether I should buy a 5-cassette sampler from the label. Problem is, I only really like 3 of the cassettes on their current release list enough to buy them. The shipping for one cassette alone is $12, whereas five is $30, so it’s a substantial difference.
When you have no money but lots of residual and deep-seated capitalistic desires, your little brain gets wrapped up in these non-problems like mine does. I want all the cassettes! I want all the LPs from Wyrd Distro! But seriously, someone please buy me those Heaven For Real & Quaker Parents singles from Craft Single and also that Monomyth album (please and cheese!). I’ll be good (ish).
Here are a few of the artists I like off the Juniper Tree cassette roster:
Inner Exo – Shivering Window | Facebook
This track is a serious jam session. It reminds me of the kind of “I Don’t Give A Fuck” shoegaze pioneered by Guided By Voices back in 1994 on Bee Thousand. I can imagine making out to this song. And if I buy this cassette, my dream could become a reality!
Sprayed Our Names At Every Station – Vehicle Blues | Facebook
Ugh, check out that amazing tonal bend at 1:21. Doesn’t it make your knees go weak? If it doesn’t, I am genuinely surprised. Let me take you out for brunch and we can talk about it.
All the Stars that Never Were – Linda Smith
Ahh, Linda Smith. Four Track Queen. This song reminds me of sitting in your crush’s bedroom while listening to early acoustic versions of Radiohead songs. Obviously, in this scenario, your crush is a megababe singer-songwriter from the 60s.
Alright, I am tired!! At least I tried to write something, right?