I have become something that I once scoffed at.
Someone so lazy and bored that they can’t even muster up the strength to peel themselves from their couches or toilets to shop in a mall with the rest of humankind.
Someone who licks grilled cheese crumbs off their fingers while watching re-runs of Take This House on the W Network and punching in the expiry date of their credit card into PayPal.
I’m a GOD-DAMNED EBAY BIDDER.
I’ve been up since seven thirty this morning (WHY WHY WHY? It’s a SNOW DAY) placing bids like I just got a government tax-break cheque in the mail. Ha ha, jokes on me; I’m poor. Therefore, it makes even less sense to be online shopping. Here are some things that I’ve already bid on today:
- Ray Bans Wayfarers (x3)
- multiple Nintendo DS games
- an embarrassingly E-for-everyone Wii game
- a fox fur hat (?????????)
That last bid really must have inspired me, cos then I typed “Fleet Foxes” into the search engine, hoping to find rare band merch or something. Instead, I found this:
I have to admit, I was very intrigued. Any band that puts their album on eBay because they “want to let the music speak for itself” is either incredibly pretentious or extremely terrible. So I went to Lost on Purpose’s Bandcamp. And hey, they’re actually pretty good.
Listen to Track 5. No More first. Then Track 2. Love Is Not Enough.
Lost on Purpose doesn’t sound like any of the bands listed in the eBay product description, and this isn’t a bad thing. Rather, their songs are a lot darker, cleaner, and more purposeful. It brought to mind memories of Elliot Smith and Bright Eyes, two really excellent bands that have been going strong for years (despite one of them being quite dead). Lost on Purpose are a dirty glass of whisky on a chestnut brown nightstand beside a rumpled bed. They're a darkened room with a hangover, disturbed by fractures of cold afternoon light piercing past the towel-covered window.
I'm actually glad that I went on eBay all morning. And now I might have a new record to listen to while wearing my Ray Bans and fox fur hat.